i think i can safely post without revealing one thing or another...

i really miss my mom.

pum pum pu-pum

...oh. That's my heart. ...

Waiting is hard.

Here we go...

On the way for blood draw 2.

Heart has been doing flip flops and nervous stomach. :)

Please, please, please, please...faith, faith, faith, faith.

With a heart full of hope and appreciation for your support,
stace

Note From Ryan...

Hard to believe that after what started nearly a year ago, tomorrow is a BIG day for Stace and I.  Hopefully (knock-on-wood, cross your fingers, think good thoughts, send out positive vibes,  throw salt over your left shoulder, avoid all cracks in the sidewalk) our schedule will look like this: test tomorrow (comes back positive!), another blood test in about 10 days (again, comes back positive!), and then 10 days after that an ultrasound to confirm that that the embryo(s) has implanted successfully.  So really, this (could be, knock-on-wood) the start of a very nerve-wracking three weeks!.

It's been interesting to see how we handle the stress in a situation like this, one in which- even though you try to do all the "right things" possible- is essentially out of our hands.  We're doing everything possible to squeeze every last little percentage point in our favor.  On the other hand, as a few people have told us, we try to just have Faith and believe that it will happen.  (It makes you feel a little bipolar bouncing from one extreme to the other).  Which brings me to this little point...

I (much more than Stace) really do not one to jinx this, bachi this, count my chickens before they hatch, by telling people too early that Stace is pregnant.  (I think there is a residual effect from the last time when we didn't wait and told people only to have her have a miscarriage a few days later.)  So even though we are taking the first test tomorrow (and even though Stace is a little disappointed) we're not going to be announcing the results for at least a month (maybe more?).  (Stace did ask why we couldn't tell people if the test came back negative.  But if you knew we were going to tell you "no" and then we don't say anything, isn't that the same things as announcing "yes" as well?  It sounds more logical in my head, trust me.)  That way when we do announce something (hopefully that she's pregnant, again, knock-on-woood) we'll feel confident in it.

I look at it this way: tomorrow's test measures the change in HCG levels so minute that a home EPT wouldn't test positive.   (So in my mind) it'd be like a woman who is a day late on her menstrual cycle telling everyone she's pregnant (might be a tad bit too premature =) ).  So while I'm sorry to disappoint all of Stace's readers, please don't stop reading her blog!  Oh, and if you could, please send us your good thoughts, vibes, prayers, and wishes tomorrow and over the next month or so!  We really do appreciate everyone and their support.  If the love and support of family and friends could guarantee a pregnancy, Stace and I would soon be starring in our own reality show (move over, John and Kate!).

Thanks so much everyone!

Ho hum...

(sigh) The one little taste of freedom wet my appetite but back in bed already. Thank heavens for my iPhone! Too hard to use the computer when on your back but my phone helps while away the hours. (whittle away the hours? what's that term?)

Anyway, and it's let me write my little posts. :)

Thinking good thoughts towards my belly!

love,
stace

Fresh air

I am out of the house for the first time in 10 days. :)

Blood draw #1.

Fingers crossed. Fingers crossed! Fingers crossed!!

Good vibes

I'm not going to go into detail but am back flat on my back on bedrest... And am shamelessly asking for any good vibes possible thru Saturday. Please please please.

Thank you so much for keeping us in your thoughts we really appreciate it and could really use it right now.

Crossing our fingers, toes & eyes...

with love, appreciation, and heart filled with hope,
stace