Belated Happy B-day!!

With the flash flood and thunderstorms here we had no internet all last night! The forced unplug actually made for a pleasant evening, unfortunately put me a bit behind for my b-day posting!

Happy Birthday, Granny Yang. You were an amazing person with spark and spirit.


...and Happy BIG 4-0 to Todd...I hope you wake up with something warm, wiggly and a little slobbery in the morning!


(a belated Happy Birthday to Uncle Stuart too...boy there's something to be said about those Sugihara boys and the month of December...)

Forced unplug-no Internet-bday delay!!

consistent Stacy

Oh dear...so bet not a lot of you would be surprised to find that I began an online course on 12/1 and am already 3 days behind and 2 assignments overdue. ;) hee hee hee...

Whoops! But PROMISE it wasn't procrastination this time! I thought with online classes they E-MAILED you your assignments. How was I supposed to know I had to log in daily to get them.

:)

Happy Birthday Uncle Ted!

umm....so how old are you now? ;)

Oh! And happy birthday belated birthday to Uncle Jerry too! (sorry, actual facetime goes to those who i know are regular followers-unless you pay me for the spot)

Happy Birthday Daddio!

Happy Birthday Dad. (Love this picture. Wish I could have seen Mom's face when you brought Koko home. At least she was willing to take a picture despite the furry surprise.) ;)

...and for Dad, because I feel like so much has changed in so little time...here's one of your favorite quotes:

Change is not merely necessary to life - it is life.
-Alvin Toffler

We continue to adjust and adjust well. Love you, Dad.

remarkable lady and the tree

Quite an exciting way for Granny to bring in her 98th year!

http://www.kitv.com/news/25750407/detail.html

Interviewed by 3 news stations...and thanks to a slow Hawaii news day she was shown on EVERY station!

remarkable lady

To an absolutely remarkable lady...who's wit, spark, humor, memory, family values and life continue to amaze me everyday...

Happy 97th Birthday Granny.

Words can't express how appreciative I am of all you've taught us, all you've done for our family, and for helping to shape the person I am today.

Acupuncture

So in our newest step to help the fertility fairy Ryan and I have started acupuncture! I've gone once a week for 3 weeks now, and Rye started this past week. Along with acupuncture we've adopted this new TCM (traditional chinese medicine) diet to help my body become 'a positive open container' for our little fertilized seed once we're ready to continue with IVF. :)

There have been some serious changes in the Yashiro household. Namely in diet: no dairy, no wheat, no sugar, no rice, no raw veggies, no fruit...are the biggies.

And....we're following the acupuncturist's directions not only in changing our diet but but adding her daily TCM supplements as well.

Here's my black herb pills: 8 pills, 3 times a day!

By far the most difficult has been our Silkie (black) Chicken Soup. 3x/day. Here it is raw: (blech!) - it's actually small a little bigger than a cornish hen

We boil it for 3+ hours with scallions and ginger:

It looks even WORST after about an hour cause then the head and feet pop out!! Totally unprepared for that the first time I opened the pot. Ryan has to take over after that. I can't handle seeing the eye sockets, beak and feet. (double blech!!) But afterwards at least the soup isn't black: (and actually very tolerable with a little salt and the ginger...and yes, rye has to drink this too)

Happy Halloween

Woo Hoo!!! I'm 30 again! Boy does it feel great to get younger. :)

Rye and I both had a nice LONG weekend, he took off 2 days, and I took off 1 so with 11/2 being off for state employees we had a great birthday weekend.

Should've taken more pics from our Halloween Hoopla at Uncle Jerry's...here's one of the only ones I have this year. ;) It's the extent of my creativity for our costume.

Can you guess what we are?!

Happy Birthday Aunty Nina!!

back to the beginning

back to square one.

talked with Pacific IVF. they've agreed that we should stop OCPs (birth control pills) for now as we don't know how long it will take to create our genetics panel.

rye and i will be going in on wednesday for an update with the nurse as well as for a blood test for them to send to Reprogenetics. and cec has swabbed her cheek for us (they mailed her a lab kit!) and overnighted it (for $6o) to New Jersey. (hmm...wonder what they're doing with that bit of her cheek right now?) ;)

meanwhile even with the possible 3+ month wait, we're maintaining no caffeine or alcohol. which has actually been more difficult then i thought, and i'm not even a REAL coffee drinker! i gave myself a little reprieve and am now drinking about 2 cups of decaf a week. :) Hurray.

on a little more interesting note: will be beginning acupuncture specifically oriented towards fertility and ivf this week. should be interesting!

memory lane and my sister...

and since we're taking that little trip down memory lane...

Happy Birthday Uncle Al!

6 decades really isn't that big a deal. This could have been taken yesterday. :)

little break, little niece

as many of you know Rye's sister Shelly had a little baby girl a couple of months ago...and with our lag in IVF his mom thought it would be nice for the 2 of us (me and her) to have a little break and zip on over to maui last weekend.

i love my little niece. (told Shelly i wouldn't post her name anywhere on the internet, in exchange for her letting us post pictures of her) ;)

it was the perfect escape:

my little niece...

the maui county fair...

where there were lots of animals...

and lots and LOTS of super yummy food. (like creamhorns from Stillwells)

and just in case you missed the cheeks...more pictures of the cutie...

mom moment

...was going to post about this weekend....but had a pretty tough mom moment tonight...tougher than i've had months...and i know there will be moments that will just reach out and grip you...and make you feel this hole and sadness that makes you feel like the tears just won't stop...

...and maybe it's partly because this whole babymaking (or attempt at it) makes me miss her so much more...and all the more emotional....but in the wake of my crying...i decided instead to blog about mom...and how much i miss her...


and remind me how she can still make me smile....(like the time she fell off her bike on a completely flat surface while riding in Carmel)
...or maybe like the time we started off on our hike to Mt. Fuji and 1) her yen offering bounced out of the shrine box, 2) she nearly knocked down all of our walking sticks and 3) then turned the wrong direction and proceed to walk DOWN the mountain instead of up.

hee hee hee...see...laughing now and crying at the same time. boy was mom special.... and boy mom are you missed.

love you whereever you are,
stace

interesting news...

So 2 new pieces of information -

• Dad's blood test results are back. He is not an RB1 carrier.

• And according to our IVF nurse the panel of genetics tests Reprogenetics is creating for us, may be be around $10,000.

Rye and I have some thinking to do...

genetics lesson 2

Maila's comment about genetics...suddenly blasted me back to our genetics college course we took together - and thought you'd appreciate this little fact we learned since I have no IVF update for today.

The olfactory receptor that allows you to smell a specifically different chemical in your urine after you eat asparagus is genetic.

In layman's terms: your pee smells different after you eat asparagus. means your sibling can tell smell the difference too, and probably either your mom or dad.

No idea what i'm talking about? Neither does your mom and dad. :) (but it's there trust me, in fact i can smell you in the stall next to you after you've eaten asparagus)

hee hee...sorry. was that TMI for the day?

Signing out,

Stace - Professor Miya-Genetics Guru

little snag --> big blip

little snag --> big blip --> shugamuggies! (a local term according to todd, tho i've never heard this before in my life) ;)

(WARNING - lots of boring technical science stuff, it's okay to stop reading here)

So here is the PGD elaboration on why our little snag has turned into a 12 week big blip of a shugamuggie. (i'm going to use this word a lot now, i like how it sounds)

• Fact 1: I'm an RB1 (retinoblastoma gene) carrier.

• Fact 2: If our baby inherits the RB1 gene (50/50 chance of it) there is a 99.7% chance of penetrence meaning they will get it too (cecily is a weirdo anomaly, not that that was really news to anyone...hee hee...but she's an RB1 carrier who did NOT get cancer, so anomaly and lucky to boot)...oh and inherited retinoblastoma also carries a 60% chance of it being bilateral. :[
  
• Fact 3: Preimplantation Genetic Diagnosis can determine whether or not the fertilized embryos are carriers, so that we are only implanted with 'non-carriers'

Pretty easy right? Well turns out that last one is a doozy. What happens is they fertilize my egg, with Rye's sperm. 24 hours later it goes from 1 -> 2 -> 4 -> 8 cells. They then biopsy one of those 8 cells on the 2nd day and overnight them super fast to New Jersey (yes we've found a lab!).

Here's where the SUPER complicated part starts. Because they only have one itty bitty (super understatement) cell to work with they need to duplicate it's gene-code. While duplicating the gene-code there can be super small errors. Errors that may result in deletions of certain frames. This would be bad because what they're looking for is a specific frameshift mutation that both Cec and I have which in our case means you're an RB1 carrier and if some frames are deleted on the duplicated gene-code then it may test negative for RB1 even if the embryo is a carrier. Make sense? (i had to read the sentence over again to make sure i had it right)

So... in order to account for the possibility of those errors it would really help 1) to know which parent we inherited it from and 2) to match our parents DNA, Cecily's DNA and my DNA all together so they can compare all the chromosomes and pairs, some of the linkages and frames and make sure they're not missing anything.

Pretty surreal.

So what happens now? Dad is completing his genetics test to see if he's a carrier. (the odd and complicated part being, neither dad OR mom might be an actual carrier-as in RB1 is not written on their gene-code since neither of them had it, it may just be on their gonadal cells) Both Cec and Dad are being sent cheek swab kits to take samples of their DNA. Ryan and I will give blood samples. And from all of that they'll create a panel of tests to be able to screen our single cell biopsies to determine if they're RB1 carriers. 3 weeks from the time they receive our labs till they can give us any updates and then about 8-9 weeks to create the panels and tests.

WHEW.

any questions? ;) hope you enjoyed the genetics lesson of the day. anyone still awake?


definitely learning something new everyday,

stace

perspective...

thanks for the supportive emails, texts and messages...the day has brought perspective as i knew it would...as well as a couple bouts of tears...

3 months i know doesn't seem like a long time in the broad scope and range of things...it was just that it seemed like such a step back versus a step forward...and on top of the emotions and disappointment a long with that...came the more realistic problem of insurance coverage.

my insurance changes involuntarily in January (political garbage) which means we know longer know what or if it will be covered since we may be half way through the process. we were also hoping that with the change in insurance companies, since it's legally required to cover IVF at least once in Hawaii per carrier, that Ryan and I could use it as a backup shot at another IVF go if we needed it...(perhaps baby #2 years down the line? or worst case scenerio attempt #2).

but we're still grateful that we have the option at all, and if it means having an RB1 free baby any amount of waiting is worth it to get the testing done accurately. (more on the issues with that later)

meanwhile...as Rye has always said, why be normal when you can be different? and so I guess for us, why take the short way, when you can take the long complicated, windy route instead? :)

...sometimes the windy routes are more scenic.

trying to take the bumps in stride,
stace

not good news

ever wonder why things have to be so complicated sometimes?

we're at least another 12 weeks out. got off the phone with genetics company bout 20 minutes ago and just scanned and sent all of our reports...will explain later when i'm not trying not to cry.

:(

oh the joy...

oh the joy of going through puberty again AND hitting middle age at the same time. (hee hee...does 35 count as middle age?)

wonderful side effect of BCPs have been monstrous pimples on my forehead....WHILE simultaneously breaking out into hundreds of white hairs (pretty sure not a side effect of BCPs, just a wonderful symptom of turning 35).

Oh the joy. ;)

gracefully aging into adolescence,

stace

PS...no news on the schedule, finally got a lab referral though, NJ time means hopefully getting a hold of them before I leave for work at 6 tomorrow...hopefully some news soon!

pigs fly! pigs fly!

pigs continue to fly about here in Honolulu.

Not only has it been a full WEEK of blog updates, but I BAKED today!!! Good lord I actually put something in the oven and made something yummy come out!!


apparently miracles do happen,
stace

PS....sorry, no IVF update today...still waiting ;)

Happy Birthday Aunty Pat! :)

little snag

So we've hit a little snag (and we haven't even started yet!).

Part of the IVF process for Rye and I, since I'm a RB1 (retinoblastoma gene) carrier, is that we'll be going through the process of Preimplantation Genetic Diagnosis. It allows us to test the embryo after it's been fertilized to see whether Ryan's gene's won out or mine did, and implant only those that are not RB1 carriers.

Pretty amazing. (especially considering they take a 1 cell biopsy from an 8 cell embryo)

The snag we hit is that apparently the PGD test for RB1 isn't common enough for the regular labs to do this yet, not your normal labs in Hawaii (several of which actually do inhouse PGD), not your normal labs on the West Coast (that they use for more complicated tests)...apparently, there might be a lab that they will do a PGD test for RB1 in Chicago...but it takes more paperwork, setting up accounts, jumping through some sort of complicated hoops...

and that's why are schedule is on hold.

So we wait. ;) And I learn to be patient and not to have to have a set schedule at this very moment. (but i'll let you know as soon as I do!)

Thanks for checking in.

love,
stace

no schedule --> anxious!

We've still got no schedule yet, which is causing a little anxiety on my part. Really, there's not a lot we can do right now anyway (except pop my BCP at the same time nightly)...but it's hard not knowing exactly what the next month is going to look like.

They were supposed to call with our schedule on Monday, then Tuesday, and I called today and still no schedule ready so we're waiting.

The rough schedule will look something like 14 days of Birth Control Pills, 7 days of Guzy-something or other pills (and BCP), 10 days of lupron shots, egg retrieval (sedation), 1 day of rest to heal, fertilization, genetic testing, implantation of good embryos, 3 days of bed rest, 7 days of taking it easy and....DiNG! Twinkle DING! (that was the fertility fairy coming to visit)

I think I just want something tangible to look at so I know where I am....or it makes me feel like I have more control over what's going on. Maybe I'll google and see if there's anything we can do to up our chances...(hee hee....i tried to explain to 96 year old Granny today what Google was, it was an enlightening conversation, maybe I should have used the example 'ways to help the fertility fairy find you')

ttfn,
stace

Oh dear...

Oh dear...Ryan and I have been having a hard enough time remembering to take ONE birth control pill at the same time daily, and this is the EASY part!

Wait till the injections, ultra sounds and multiple pills start...we're going to have to be more organized.

Maybe 'there's an app for that'?

Happy Birthday Mom

Thank you for all you've given us. Thank you for all you taught us. Thank you for making us who we are. We miss you.

IVF Day 2

Picked up Oral Contraceptives (aka- birth control pills) today. Seems so totally backwards to be put on BCP when we're trying to get pregnant! But when you look at the fact that we're pretty much stopping all normal natural attempts at getting pregnant and instead making it so that it's completely controlled guess it sort of makes sense. ;) We're basically stopping my body from doing anything we don't want it to until it's the correct time! :)

IVF Day 1

Blood test check! Marissa (my new lab tech friend) did a great job with the little needle and 3 vials done! (turns out she did IVF too, unfortunately not so successful for her, but it was a nice chat, with a couple good pointers, and she gave us a big wish of luck)

IVF dinner #1. Homemade pizza. We're on a health kick since we've got basically 3 weeks to get Rye's boys tip-top healthy and 5 weeks for me to be in prime implanting shape:





PS...oh my goodness I blogged 2 days in a row?! pigs just flew by the window.

Good Vibes My Turn and the Fertility Fairy

So as many of you know Ryan and I have been trying to have a baby for sometime. NOT quite as easy as 8th Grade Biology would have you believe, hence we have not yet been visited by the Fertility Fairy...

2 years later, long story short, we're going to begin IVF (In Vitro Fertilization) and see if science can give the Fertility Fairy a hand.

We were going to keep this on the down-low, but with the amount of appointments, procedures and then lastly egg retrieval, implantation process and bed rest there was no way to get around telling my coworkers and decided we couldn't tell them without telling you, our family and friends. (Besides, selfishly, we'll need all of the good vibes that we can get. This is a one shot deal)

SoOoOooo...since I know there were a handful of you (small handful!) who were saying I haven't updated my blog recently...Woo Hoo!! I've decided to keep a journal of our IVF process here (not the super icky parts mind you) but I think this'll help Rye and I with the daily process and me cope with all the down time.

Step 1 begins tomorrow...with a simple blood test....

crossing our fingers, praying and here we go.....

She's out!!!

Guess who's out of surgery?! My birthday-present-wearing-sister!! (not as in birthday present I gave her, birthday present as in the one she bought for me but wore it to work today to make herself feel better, and then went to eat ice-cream to make me feel better) Yes weird family. I know.

Needless to say she's out of surgery (has been for about 1368 hours now) and doing well. Remarkably well. ;) (see www.hitosea.blogspot.com for the specifics on recovery)

Thank you for the good vibes. They were very much appreciated.

good vibes! good vibes!!

We're in the surgery waiting room....3.5 hours down only 1 hour to go....sending Cec good vibes!

Goodbye Mr. Thyroid!! Hello cancer-free Cec!!!!

Cecily is married

Good lord, my little sister is growing up...


...and I've never seen her look happier.

and so it begins...

bride and groom arrive in 3 hours!!!

so much to do! so much to do!! let the whirlwind begin.... ;)

family

i can't tell you how much i appreciate my family...who took what could have been an awkward and difficult night and made it into something pleasant and enjoyable. thank you.

try again...

Looks like the pictures might not be loading...so let's try again...

....here are the pics of the blanket...and the burp cloth with the blanket

Here's Ryan's burp cloth (my cousin Ryan is very into Spiderman) ;)

and the baby onsies...my first applique attempt. ;) obviously i need more practice!

first applique attempt

and to attempt to follow in mom's footsteps. no cute bears, but here's my first applique attempt:


the cupcake came out pretty cute....but the umm....K looks kind of like an X. i have to work on my curves and sharp corners. ;)

New Sewing project for Kylie

Hawaii Blanket for Baby Kylie: (looks super simple, but took me over 8 do overs on the stitches cause of the knit bumpy fabric)



Made it to match the burp cloths for Michele (they have a sort of Hawaii theme):




hee hee....and then didn't want Ryan to feel left out, so made a burp cloth for Ryan to use:

It's amazing how 3 years can feel like such a lifetime to be without Mom...and yet, if I look down the hall, it feels like only a moment ago she was walking down it and smiling at me.

I know that in the days, weeks, months and years that have past that we've learned to keep going...and keep going and smile...and keep going and live life and laugh...and I know that I've learned to not feel guilty about living life, laughing and being happy again...and that learning to live a life without mom has become exactly that...living life without mom...

But boy there are days like today, or moments that just grab you...when you know, that there's still a void and this hole in your heart that really only one person can fill...and boy do I miss her.

I love you, mom....
and miss you so much more than words could ever say.

my revelation

I made an important revelation over the past 4 wonderful days:

My body was clearly made to lead the life of luxury...to live in that sort of existence where someone cooks, cleans, makes my bed daily so that I in turn can expand my mind by exploring, watching sunsets, appreciating the millions of sparkling stars, sipping rainbow colored drinks and watching the surf.

This grueling tax of daily life? Chores? Laundry? Dishes? Definitely not for me.

:)

(pictures and post will follow once i screen the 500 shots)

up up...

up up...and AWAY!!!!!

Off for a 4 day getaway for some alone and birthday time with Ryan. :) :) :D YAY!!!

(and some much MUCH needed R&R) Big Island here we come!!!

sisterly love

i love my sister. even if she's stupid and didn't let me win. (see below)

i should've won.

...but i suppose she's a big girl and it's time for her to fight her own battles...and hopefully for part of which i'll be there beside her. ;)

sibling rivalry

in the spirit of NOT letting my sister beat me. looks like i'm following suit and getting a needle biopsy tomorrow of my thyroid gland.

felt some odd pressure going on at the base of my throat last week, went in for a fast check-up on Thursday, to have my doctor exclaim, "oh! we need to get you in for an ultra sound right away!" ;) not the most comforting words, but i had figured as much. unfortunately the ultra sound shows a couple of things that we need to check out....and check it out in the form of a needle biopsy.

definitely my bachi for laughing at my sister's anxiety ridden reaction to her needle biopsy last week....and as i told my dad. we all know that i'm the one one in the family with the medical issues, so when Cec said she had to have a biopsy, apparently my body figured, 'heck no. if she's gonna have one, we're gonna have one too! and we're gonna make the lump at least twice her size!'

:) so here we go. at least it was a good excuse for a 4 day weekend. (furlough friday) biopsy is 9:30 mon morning....test results for both of us back tuesday...think good vibes!

unconditional love

there's nothing like the unconditional love from a dog...

hoku literally jumps up and down (on her front paws) when rye and i go over to his parents. we were making flower arrangement for Shelly's shower last night, and so hoku had to go to the bedroom, but stood at the door looking out at me waiting for attention. whenever i turned around this is what she looked like. ;)

more sewing...

more burpies that i gave to coworkers and friends...

don't laugh...

okay, don't laugh. i realize this is just a straight stitch. but seriously they're selling something like this, but not even cute at 2 baby boutiques here for $13 for one or $22 for 2 and look, mine is cute!!!

And you can't see, but I did a zig zag stitch to make it cuter. Hee hee hee....I can SEW!!!

(umm....it's a burping cloth in case you were kind of confused-just sewed a cute swatch onto a $2 trifold)

pleased as pie!

Stacy is pleased as pie!!! (is that how the saying goes?)

I'm TOTALLY proud of myself! (hee hee...if I do say so myself)

But Mom would be really proud of me and Aunty Pat, you too!

Been going to all these baby stores recently (unfortunately not for me)...and they sell these burp cloths made out of diaper trifolds and sell them for BEAUCOUP bucks...and I thought, HEY-that's a straight stitch! I can do that!

AND I DID!!!! :) :) :D YIPPEE FOR ME! I actually SEWED something!!!! Super easy. But SUPER cute, and cost me all of $2!!

Will have to show you guys later when I have a whole set to show off. :)

no seattle

sorry seattle peeps.

we talked about it. thought about selling the car, but looks like we're going to fix it.

no seattle this summer after all.

perspective...

perspective...i need to remember perspective....i have my health, right?

$7500 is only money.

(sigh) and what it's going to cost to fix the car. :(
...and a little cry on the way home.

Superbowl and the beach

Superbowl party at the Miyashiros this afternoon. Hawaii style. :) We made spam musubi, nori wrapped mochiko chicken, pigs in a blanket and nachos. For just 4 of us. Although it does beat the 2 of us (just rye and i) that watched the superbowl last year with the same amount of food.

Had more fun after the superbowl (YAY Saints!) taking Hoku to the beach. We taught her a new trick!!

She fetches her own leash! (course she broke it, which is a bum since it was $50...but a lot of fun nontheless)

Carnival with Granny

Had a great time at Carnival...well LONG time at Carnival with Granny. Boy can't believe a 96 year old can last longer than me! Had figured maybe 2 hours, but Granny hung out for FOUR! Walked through the rides, the White Elephant, the plants, the food...watched Marley and Macie on the Kiddie rides...had lunch and THEN after 4 hours she was set to go. :)

Here are some pics - (bad quality, from my phone)

hee hee....granny's comments were SO funny! asking what they were waiting in line for. Why would they wait so long. Don't they have other things to do? how crazy the rides were, expensive...


we actually stood here at the bumper cars watching for a long time! :)


Portugese bean soup for lunch...Granny made LOTS of friends (and recognized SO many people, her memory is amazing). :)

Fun time at the Carnival. heh...with my 96 year old Grandmother!! :D

tidal craziness

Somebody needs to document the insane craziness that occurs at schools during full moons. Then they need to take that and see how much exponentially worst it gets during the extreme tides.

I don't know HOW many times I exclaimed today at work, "Is it a full moon today?!" not really knowing that it was until my drive home with the huge round moon in the sky....then belatedly also remember them saying on the radio that it was an extreme low tide.

Kids were insane, fights, crying, biting, vomiting, poking, pinching, punching...on top of which CPS came to remove a kid from their home, at my initiation.

Geez what a day.

I'm really grateful for my husband. :) (sigh)