Happy New Year

It's the evening of January 2nd, and I'm lying in bed with my 2 boys as they take a late nap, listening to Ryan softly snore and Daniel's breathing...and this unfamiliar feeling fills me briefly and I can identify it before it's gone. It's happiness. It's that light shiny feeling you get inside...that I used to get so often...but haven't felt since we lost Andrew...and before the sadness crept back in... I smiled to myself and realized that this is a good thing, and this is a good way to start the year... and then tears came to my eyes, because it's hard to be really happy without Andrew...but then you look at my sweet little boy sleeping beside me and you think, well how can I not be?

We made it through the Holidays, and that's a big step. It was hard to feel not entirely joyful like the Holidays normally are for us, but we made it through and though there were tears (lots of them) there were also lots of smiles and even laughter.

I refuse to say that 2012 was a bad year, because despite the incredible challenges we faced, we were also graced with such infinite joy for 4 months...but I think it's okay to wish for us and for those of you reading our blog that 2013 be a little better...be filled with peace, be filled with happiness, be filled with love, with hope and a little more stability.

Wishing you a very Happy New Year.

With Love,

Stacy, Ryan & Daniel















PS...one of my New Years Resolution is to be better at blogging particularly about Daniel so our mainland family and friends can be kept up to date more. ;)